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  • 26 min read

    If you let them get to you, they win.

    What is up Trailblazers? Chad McMillan, Fresh and Raw episode 11 today. Feeling we're getting dialed on this content, feeling this stuff is really starting to tighten up. Hope you're finding a lot of value from these different segments that I'm putting together.

    These are cool topics. These are things I've wanted to get off my chest, these are things that people ask me about all the time, all day long for their businesses, or about businesses I'm involved in, and how to. This is just a natural extension of myself, and things I'm already doing.

    But, what's really rad about all this is I get to share it with more and more people. So instead of just saying it once, and it disappears into the cosmos; I say it once, and it's forever crystallized in a resource that people can come back to whenever it feels right for you, or for them to pick up on my insights related to the topic. That said, which you could receive and accept. Or, throw away, and never look at or consider again. Up to you, but I'm doing it anyways.

    So, here we go. Today's segment, which I'm finding is relevant, it's perpetually relevant, it's always relevant I think, to different people at different times. But, it is a solo experience usually, when you work through this stuff. It is dealing with the naysayers, the skeptics, the critics, the negative energies that come with all of this type of criticism. Not necessarily constructive criticism, but personal criticism of your life, and your choices, and the path you're on, and the things you're doing.

    Sometimes this is private, right? Which is potentially more damaging, cause nobody else hears that you're receiving these types of things. They're just coming at you, and either you are strong enough to manage them and deal with them yourself, or you're not.

    And if you're not, this could lead to years of abuse, right? And years of negativity in your life and your world. Impacting you in all kinds of tough ways, without you even realizing it. Or, without you even being able to move through it, given how deeply wounding it can be.

    You don’t need to take that necessarily head on and receive that, because you’re less than the person you can be.

    There are many, many people I know who have been through this, and some that still go through this with these types of patterns. There's some people that think that that's what love is, right? Is being abused, and these different types of ways of heavily being criticized, or belittled, or similar. That type of attention is actually what they feel love to be, and what they think is what they deserve. Imagine that. Maybe this resonates with you, maybe that is a part of how you experience the world, no judgment.

    But, what I am saying is that you do not need to experience life in that way. You do not need to take that right on the chin we'll say. You don't need to take that necessarily head on and receive that, because you're less than the person you can be, or that you're destined to be. Less than your highest, greatest, possible high vibing self.

    So, we're getting into this topic of dealing with naysayers, dealing with abuse of people, dealing with the skeptics, and the criticism, and the negative wah-wah energy that people send us when they're not happy about something. And, the ways they send it, and how to manage it, and how to deal with it. How to integrate it, how to receive it, how to draw awareness to our reactions to it. All in the betterment of our lives, and all in the betterment of how we carry ourselves.

    Remember, all of my content, everything I talk about, all of my ideas and insights come from a place of greater empowerment, right? Of me, through the techniques, philosophies, perspectives that I use to live my life, to hold my own space, to be my own person, to carry my own voice, and for you to find that similar strength in yourself.

    As I'm sharing this content I am in a room on my own traveling, it's awesome. But, I'm in a room on my own, in my own space sharing these ideas. I don't have to, but I do because I want to. I do because I feel I'm supposed to. I do because I feel I'm meant to share these ideas with you, so that you too can feel these types of strengths, and you can avoid these types of negative patterns that are depressive, draining, abusive, low vibrating, all these different ways, and make us feel low, right? We're talking about high vibration, living in high vibrating, techniques of living. Despite the conditions we find ourselves in. Despite wherever we're at.

    No matter who we are, where we're from, what we're about, what we do. This is about an exploration of universal truths in the way that we live our lives, so that we can apply these types of techniques to multiple scenarios without any exorbitant cost to ourselves, or our spirit, or a deflection or distraction from our path and our purpose and bringing our own unique magic to the world as we are each uniquely meant to do. So, let's get into this.

    THE ATTENTION

    The more we move into things to make a difference, the more we’re actually potentially criticized by the peers that exist in the world.

    The naysayers, the critics, the verbal abuse, or online, or social abuse, what have you. These things come from all kinds of different places, right? It depends what we do. The more we make moves, I will suggest, for ourselves to be somebody. To step up and do something impactful. Disruptive, something powerful or empowering. Something that shifts or moves the yardstick, that disrupts norms, that improves in efficiencies that garners attention in some way.

    It's very easy to just hide, and be hidden, and stay hidden in the shadows and never contribute to anything, right? But as soon as we move into any sort of world, I mean truly we're always connected. Even when we think we're isolated. I mean, isolation is still an act of doing that will still be subject to criticism, or could be subject to criticism, and critique, and all this good stuff.

    Then, the more we move into things to make a difference, the more we're actually potentially criticized by the peers that exist in the world, that we are impacted by, right? Or, that we impact by those same moves. And so, that ruffles things up, and that attracts commentary. Because people like to talk about other people. They like to comment on other people. It's just a thing, right?

    How does that affect us, and what do we do about that? How do we receive whatever's being sent our direction, and what do we do for ourselves to move forward from those places?

    A BUTTERFLY FLAPS ITS WINGS

    Anything you’re doing, no matter how you’re doing it is impacting someone else around you.

    So, getting into it. You could be a performer, or an activist, or a middle manager in your company, or an employee at a restaurant. Anything you're doing, no matter how you're doing it is impacting someone else around you, right? A butterfly flaps its wings. And when that happens, the impact of that on other people is a trigger. It serves as a trigger for where they're at in their own lives, and how they perceive you to fit into your life, or their lives, or not, right? And how they want you to or not.

    And so, the journey in this topic, and exploring this topic is one, recognizing how we have the potential to impact other people. It is tough to control exactly how we're going to impact everyone.

    We are a messenger, in that they're also messengers to us. And, what we are exploring is both that connection between us and other people, and their reaction to our presence in whatever we're looking to do and achieve. That does not mean, no matter how they react, that we shouldn't be doing what we're doing. I mean, we gauge ourselves by how we feel as it relates to our actions, our path and our purpose. If that is disruptive to other people, so be it is my perspective for one. Because, this is the work we are meant to do. As long as the work we are doing is in alignment with our highest and greatest good, and the highest and greatest good of others. Of the best interest for ourselves and keeping in mind the best interest of our world.

    That does not mean, no matter how they react, that we shouldn’t be doing what we’re doing.

    HOLDING YOUR SPACE

    We have to learn how to hold space, have to learn how to receive what is occurring with this type of a pattern, with these types of moments and events. And then, how to navigate and deal with them.

    Now, firstly in recognizing naysayers, skeptics, critics, and all of this stuff that attack us is, recognizing that we have a vibrational impact on them. So one, being aware and sensitive of that, and to that. But two, also holding our own space, understanding that we have the right to be who we are. We have the right to hold our own space, and we do not have to change who we are for the comfort of someone else who may feel uncomfortable by our presence. Their discomfort is not our responsibility. Their discomfort is their responsibility to work through. We are a messenger for them in that respect, and it is for them to explore what we are triggering within them, to integrate and make those adjustments and aligns for themselves as maybe required.

    But, it is not for us to concern ourselves with, the fact that they are triggered. It is for us to be aware of where and how, possibly, we may trigger people in those respects, but also recognize that their response or reaction to them are not simply in direct relationship to us. It is that we are bringing out those triggers within them, and we are the lightning rod for their reaction, okay? This is important to recognize, the difference in how people can respond and react to our presence.

    But I will say this. The path to everything you want and seek in your life, and the prosperity you seek in life, will require on some level for you to be face the music.

    But, it doesn't mean we shy away from our work, just the fact that it exists. And, many people do, right? They say, "I don't want to participate." And they skirt opportunity, they skirt promotion, they skirt away from the big moments, right? We've all done it, I imagine. I have, I know it, and I recognize it. And, have done things about it, and continue to because we don't find it comfortable, or enjoyable to receive this perpetual or constant stream of criticism. We don't wish to be the lightning rod, so we avoid it, right? Many, many people do.

    But I will say this. The path to everything you want and seek in your life, and the prosperity you seek in life, will require on some level for you to be face the music, as we say. To stand up and be that lightning rod. To move through those energies, and to have an impact, to provide value to the world, to share your ideas and perspectives, to hold your own space and vibrate in alignment with your greatest and highest good.

    Even just a smile on your face could trigger someone who's unhappy. "Oh, look at that person. They're smiling over there. I hate it when people smile." I mean, that's not your problem. It doesn't mean you shouldn't walk around smiling, enjoying your life, right? That's stuff that has to do with them, and it has to do with experiences they've had, and the reasons they feel unhappy. But you can't do that work for them, and neither can I. I can't do the work for you. You have to do it for yourself, and we have to do it for ourselves, right?

    So, when this type of energy comes at us, where are we at, who are we, what are we doing? Now, the deeper we are confident with ourselves, and with our path, and with our purpose, and the work we're doing, and the mission that we're on. Then, the more comfortable we feel with whatever comes at us, right? It's not necessarily going to deflect, or shake us up.

    But, think of it this way. If we've been isolating ourselves for however long from people, because of criticism, or any sort of, we'll say negative pattern like that, that's come at us for a long time. And the first step we take back into the world, we wake up one day, we say, "Okay, I'm going to reenter this world. I'm going to go make a difference today." And the first person you run into snickers at you and says, "Ugh, what do you think you're doing?" Or something. I mean, imagine, right? If that's the first step you make back into participating into the world, and to the global community in an active way, and that's the first comment that you get.

    Well first off, that's a reflection of you. It's a reflection of you mirroring back to yourself your own limitations, so that you can integrate and move past them. That's one, so keep that in mind. But two, I mean what's the initial potential reaction going to trigger, right? It could very well trigger you to just turn around and go back to where you were, right? And say, "Oh, forget it. Why am I even trying this today?" Right? Imagine that. That's a true thing, that happens for people. Maybe it happens for you. We cannot let that lead, or dictate, or dominate the way that we live our lives. So, we have to learn how to hold space, have to learn how to receive what is occurring with this type of a pattern, with these types of moments and events. And then, how to navigate and deal with them.

    TAKE IT IN AND PUSH IT OUT

    This is how I suggest you do that. Firstly, someone comes at you with criticism, okay? It could be about your image, it could be about the work you've done, it could be about your intentions, it could just be about the look on your face. I mean people ... Like, whatever right? That's their stuff, whatever triggers them.

    But, we have a responsibility to receive it, and receive it in conscious and responsible ways. So that, it one, disarms the situation. Two, it does not dissuade us from doing our work, and fulfilling our life's path and purpose. And three, it allows us to carry on, continue our day without that impacting how we feel about ourselves. Our joy, peace, love, and happiness that we seek and enjoy in our lives and our world.

    So, first thing, someone comes at you. It could be anything. They don't like the look of your face, they don't like the work you've done, they don't like whatever. Here's how we manage these things.

    • Where it comes from

    Firstly, we want to consider the source. Who is the person doing this? Do they have a pattern of being abusive to people? Is it just part of who they are, and present in their own lives? Remember, if this is the case, this is quite likely that they're unhappy with themselves, and it is a reflection of same. That is why they project this all over everyone else. Their lack of satisfaction, or their lack of enthusiasm for your presence or your work. So, consider the source, who is this coming from? Is it a colleague at work, is it a confidant, is it a business partner, is it a friend, is it a foe, right? Is it an interested party, or a disinterested party? Any of these types of people, got to consider where it's coming from.

    • What they’re saying

    Consider too, consider the message. In delivering the message, the messenger will do this in various ways. It's not always the way you think you should receive it, but we need to be listening for the message. Why are we receiving this criticism? Who is this criticism coming from, as we said. But then, why are we receiving this criticism? Are we meant to receive this? What are we supposed to take away from it? If we weren't supposed to take away anything from it, then we wouldn't be receiving it. So, what are we supposed to recognize and acknowledge from what is being shared?

    It doesn't mean we need to take it on, but we should responsibility and consciously explore the message no matter how it's being delivered. If someone's yelling at me, that doesn't mean I need to sit there and be yelled at, right? I do deserve, as you do, as we all do, to be appropriately respected as human beings, and individuals. However, what is being said in the yelling? Between all the emotional triggers the messenger is feeling and delivering the message that is channeling through them. Are there kernels of wisdom and insight that are actually reasonable to accept?

    Oh, you know what? That's a good point, right? If they're saying, "Oh, you know. This guy, this actor, da, da, da, da, da. His performances are so flat. Da, da, da, da, da," right? "In this example ... Here's a great example. In this scene, "Da, da, da, da. They should have played it this way and done it this thing." Okay, well that's interesting. It's one thing to just criticize me, or criticize someone else as a shitty actor per se, right? Or a shitty, whatever, employee or what have you.

    But, consider the message within that delivery, which is not the best way to deliver that. Let's just give them the benefit of the doubt, that maybe they just don't know how to deliver messages responsibility. They haven't learned that for themselves yet, so it comes out as anger, and emotion, and all this resentment, and all this sort of stuff. But, what is the actual message? If there are kernels of wisdom and insight in the message. We, as receivers should do our part to find them. Because, they are constructive, they are just being poorly delivered. So, in alignment with our delivery of our work, and fulfillment, and achievement of our mission and missions that we are on. Which, is part of our purpose, right?

    • How we receive it

    And, I'll say this again. In alignment with our greatest and highest good. So, we need to explore what those are. Sometimes when people come at us, and they're all aggressive, and angry and whatever. How do we disarm them, as opposed to meeting them there? We often meet people there, and then just yell back, right? What value does that create? There's a great line in this script that I read the other day and it says, "If we both take up arms, we all lose." Think of that, right?

    If someone's yelling at us, if I yell ... Or, yelling at you, or yelling at us, or similar. And I yell back;  Who does that serve? It doesn't serve either of us. I can yell back, and sometimes to hold the space it's appropriate to speak firmly to disarm that circumstance and situation, and hold our space without being bullied and overrun. But at the same time, just yelling back creates conflict and continues to muddy the message of what is actually being said.

    And so, take this in all context, right? This is in person, this could be socially, online, in comments on social media. This could be publicly on a blog, or in a news article, or a publication. It could be in an interoffice email, it could be at the water cooler in your office, it could be from a customer, at a restaurant. It could be anything like this. Contextualize it as it relates to your own world and life, but how do you respond to that is the next thing you need to consider.

    Because, we have considered the source, so does the source have value? Do they have experience, do they have legitimacy in sharing what they're sharing? Consider the message. Where is the kernel of insight and wisdom that we are meant to receive from what is being said, even though we really don't necessarily like how we are receiving it? Then consider the response. Do I just react and meet them with argumentative matching, or do I disarm the individual or individuals? Do I acknowledge them? Many people just like to be heard, so do we acknowledge that they're being heard? Is it warranted for them to be heard? There's certain levels that we do not need to accept.

    I heard, or I received a note yesterday as an example, which is part of the inspiration for this piece, right? It was somebody just saying, "Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah." As part of my response, my reaction. "Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah." And criticizing me, just maybe I won't go too specific on it. But, criticizing me about some sort of activity that's occurred in one of the ventures I'm involved with, that I've had absolutely nothing to do with.

    Now, to this person, they have done little to no homework on my involvement, or what my involvement might be in that circumstance. It's their perception of a pattern that they think, that they get to speak to me that way. I mean it's like, give your head a shake, right? I mean, where are you coming from? No, you don't have that right. But, an example, so does that warrant a response? I mean, not really, right? I don't need to meet someone there, who just out of the blue decides to land base me about something I have absolutely zero involvement in or anything to do with. That's not my problem. That's your lack of actual exploration. Your process of discovery would be to ask me a question as to whether that would be something I am involved in, or had influence over, or what my perspectives on that are. As opposed to just out of the blue, them being triggered and reacting to me, and giving me their own hostile energy about it.

    So, what's the response? Sometimes no response is great. Sometimes a matching response is appropriate just to hold your own space, because nobody deserves or needs to be bullied. So, to firmly, clearly, and articulately say, "Excuse me. If there's something you'd like to say, I am happy to receive it. That is constructive or related to the work that I'm doing specifically. But not in the tone you're delivering it, not with the emotional attachment to what you're suggesting. And I will take that under consideration."

    Explore that. And then, integrate what’s valuable.

    I mean, there's different ways to respond without creating deeper and greater conflict. Listen for the message, consider the response. Further to that, as I've said, consider what's valuable out of that message. So, however this conversation's gone about, or these discussions gone about. Or, the back and forth on Twitter, or wherever you're having this exchange is occurring. Consider what is valuable in that exchange as in once it's occurred, and past. And be with it, and feel into what is valuable from, and valuable with that experience that you can actually take with you as insight for the continuation of your journey.

    LISTENING TO THE VALUE

    There's some reason it is meant to power you up or assist you along your way. So, explore that. And then, integrate what's valuable. So, make way for that to enter into your world. Open up for that to become a part of who you are going forward. Recognizing that you will improve in these areas. We're all improving in different areas all the time. In some areas we're experts, as I've said before. And then in some areas, we're total amateurs. Do we have the strength and wisdom, and confidence within ourselves to recognize which ones we are, and which ones we aren't? And to explore both with that degree of humility required to learn. There are healthy ways to learn, and with people that'll teach us in healthy ways. And there are unhealthy ways to learn, and you'll know the difference just by the way you feel, by the experience of learning those ways.

    That said, you need to listen for the value. It is your responsibility, and our responsibility to integrate the valuable insights that come from our messengers. Everybody around us being a messenger, regardless of how it's being delivered. That's our responsibility. We can suggest the delivery needs work, but we also acknowledge that everyone has a right, and valid opinion of what they can and should bring to our world through our experience. It doesn't mean we need to receive it, but it does mean that we should manage how it's being delivered, and we should also watch for those parts that we should take on and carry with us.

    LETTING GO

    And then beyond that, let go of what isn't. So, if it's just a bunch of personal attack about things you can't change like, "I don't like your face." It's like, "Well, you know what? That's not my problem, because I like my face, and this is the face I got. This face has a right to be here, and if you don't like it that's not my problem. So, beat it." Right? The way I said that's probably still a little bit confrontational, but the reality is, let it go. Let go of the things you can't control, right? Grant me the courage to control the things I can, and to accept the things I cannot. So, just let go what doesn't matter, right? People will experience their own karma's based on what they're putting out to attack, or shame, or belittle, or abuse other people as much as your need to be the deliverer of that karma for them. It will appear in their own experience.

    NAVIGATING CRITICISM

    Don’t react, respond.

    Some other tips for this. I know this happens to all of us all the time, these types of circumstances. Especially when we're making waves, and we should be making waves. That's the game we're in. We're disruptors, we're trailblazers, we're innovators, we're entrepreneurs, we're changing things up, we're standing up and being counted. So, we're going to make waves, right? In any way, shape, and form that is appropriate in alignment with our path, and purpose to the greatest good of all, right?

    So, some other tips for this on how to navigate these things. Don't react, respond, right? Just because someone sends us a message, or says something swiftly, and they might be in a hurry for us to respond to them. Then, we don't actually need to provide any response to them until we feel ready. So for my part, I tend to take space, because the initial reaction that we have will likely be emotional. They're trying to attack us and elicit a response. And so, the first feeling will be defensive. Your body’s fight or flight will react, physically, defensively. And, could spit fire back, right? Like I said before, that's not going to serve anybody, because there's just going to be a deeper disruption, and deeper damage done by the initial shot fired, so to speak.

    So, don't react, respond. Take the space to let the initial emotional reaction to the circumstance pass. I'll touch on this again later, because this is a really important and great topic, responding versus reacting. Just to all kinds of things in life, but especially in this. This is a real source of these types of triggers. So, in the response, act like a professional. Take the higher ground, take a calm approach, meditate first. Go for a swim, go for a workout. Give it space, let the criticism breathe. Because, the more it breathes, the less it has power over us, and the clearer what is valuable versus what isn't, what is good versus what isn't in the delivery of it, reveals itself.

    • Give it space

    And so, our response can then articulately provided. In a professional way. So, here's another note kind of to that. Think of how a mother tames an unruly child. This is probably the best way to look at it. Someone who's reacting. Being triggered by a presence in your activity and work, and criticizing you, and personally attacking you, whatever. Is like this unruly child, right? That just, "Rah, rah, rah, rah, rah, rah, rah," whatever. And they're all fired up, and we all do this.

    Now, that's great. But, how does the mother tame the child, right? Takes the child for a walk, or maybe adjusts some activities, or gives the child space, or whatever. Any of these things. Take that as a potential analogy of how to respond to your critics, and the naysayers, and the skeptics, and just negative people in general that throw these darts at you in your world.

    • Protect yourself and your brand

    Protect and defend your reputation through your own channels, as may be appropriate. So, where is your own voice hosted? This is what I talked about before, about having your own brand, and your own presence, and your own social channels. Some people just avoid this stuff. They don't want to have a presence online, because they don't want anyone to be able to talk to them. But the reality is, that you don't have actually a platform to defend yourself, or to hold your own space. There's no way for you to fire back, so to speak. Even if it's done in a professional way, to disarm those types of situations, because you don't control your own tools to do so. So, you leave the story that is written about you, you leave the criticism that is about you fully into the hands of those who have those tools, right?

    A lot of examples, a lot of companies I've worked with and been involved with. I mean, they don't even have their own blog, right? But then some blogger shows up out of the blue, like total free radical, marginal influence at best, limited experience possible. And, they write a piece about this particular company and its management for people, and absolutely land base the people.

    And then, this story actually gets ranked as one of the higher ranking stories about the company. Except, this blog has no authority, or limited authority. It has limited experience to be able to make those judgements and evaluations, and the company has done nothing to reframe, or to respond, or address any of those things through their own channels. I mean, that is a failure in public relations. That is a failure in reputation management, right? So if you're doing big things, build your own channels, and your own ability to respond to what may be required, or appropriate, right?

    To hold your own space, stand up for yourself. Don't just let people walk all over you. You're not a doormat, you're not a wet blanket, you know? Hold that space. Further extension to that, as appropriate use your own peer sources and channels to respond clearly and as swiftly as maybe necessary. Again, not reactively, responsively. Give it thought, be thoughtful, be accurate, be analytical in your consideration, don't be impulsive and emotional. But, use your own PR resources and sources, an extension of your own channels to get your message out there, and to get your response out there depending on the type of attack you're dealing with.

    To hold your own space, stand up for yourself.
    • Respect the Messenger

    If it's one person on a tweet, well then whatever. Tweet back and forth is possibly appropriate to address some skepticism or criticism. But, a bigger issue, right? An attack in an article or similar, you need to address these types of things to continue to defend your reputation. Especially if your reputation is being attacked in an unwarranted fashion. Again, don't shoot the messenger, important to say. Don't shoot the messenger. Everybody who is around us are messengers. We are triggering them by our presence, because our presence is disruptive and we're making moves. Have sympathy for the fact that, that is our impact on them. Have sympathy for the sender, and their circumstances and triggers that we might not see.

    We don't know what they're going through, we don't know what other battles they're facing, we don't know what their stressors are. But we can imagine them, right? In the stock market when dealing with public companies, and people are complaining that the stocks aren't going up. This is usually a function of people feeling tight on cash, and you are the problem, right? You're the problem because you are not making them money fast enough. For them to keep up with their expense patterns, and they're feeling tight in their own financial situations. Their stuff will pass, but they need to move that energy, they need to blame someone, they need to have an outlet for those things they're feeling.

    And, that's ... Hey, that's entirely normal for them to feel that way. You can do whatever you can do as it relates to building the fundamentals of your company and moving your company forward. And, assuming you're just doing the work, there are these other pieces and components there that are appropriate to consider, as it relates to ensuring that you're at that level and doing those things. But, you cannot be the solution for all people. We cannot be the solution for all people in all circumstances, of managing and running their own lives, and their own financial pictures.

    Case in point, I have a friend whose running super high expenses, and then equally feels super stressed about it. I mean, the connection between the two is blatantly obvious. But then, makes it my issue that they feel stressed because their financial circumstances are stressful. Well, that's a circumstance that you've created, so take responsibility for it, for one. Valid, that this, this, this, and this are in process, and we would all like those to occur. But at the same time, the trigger for you is the lifestyle you're trying to sustain and maintain. And me, just trying to make sure that I am operating at the level that allows you to continue to sustain your mansion day to day, is not my responsibility, right?

    I am not currently, presently at the time of this writing living in a mansion. But I mean, I could, and then I could call you all day and give you grief because what I'm invested in that is yours, that is not going up fast enough, is not making my mansion mortgage payments for me. I mean, come on, you know? Let's take some personal responsibility for the choices we're making. But at the same time, recognize that these are the triggers for some of these people, and why the message might be delivered sharper than you would normally think and expect.

    GIVING BACK POSITIVE ENERGY

    Remember, everything we’re trying to do is create from a sustainable place.

    Some conscious considerations that I've touched on a little bit, as it relates to dealing with hecklers, and naysayers, and all this good stuff. As I've said a few times, these are all reflections of us, right? These are mirrors of us. So, treat them in kind, treat yourself in kind. If you argue at your mirror, you're just arguing with yourself. So don't give it that energy, don't let it move you into a darker place. Find the harmony, find the light, find the good vibration in dealing with that circumstance. Keep the parts of the messages I've said that are valuable and let the rest of it go.

    But remember, these are reflections of yourself, they're reflections of ourselves. We are moving through ourselves. That's why these are showing up to challenge us, to see if we will react to them and go back to the level we were at before, or if we will integrate them, accept them in kind, and graduate to new levels of spiritual being and ascension in our journey of new realizations and growth on our path, by responding to them in conscious, and aware, awoken ways, right? Truly.

    ESTABLISHING NEW PATTERNS

    Remember this, the universe sends us messages we need to hear, right? I said this a bit before. Sometimes mixed in with old patterns of shame or abuse that we need to integrate from our paths. So, the reason these messages are being sent to us in this way is because that's how they've always been sent to us. And not until we stand up for ourselves and say, "I will not accept to receive these messages in this way anymore." Will it stop. It will continue, until you have the courage, and we each have the courage to stand up for ourselves and say, "I am not willing to accept that behavior."

    And then, we don't. And it's for us to also hold to that, because we are establishing new patterns and new paradigm for ourselves and our lifestyles, and our environments. Only we can create that for ourselves, and that is affirming both what we want, and dismissing that, that we don't, right? That's how we do that.

    What was the last point, I guess? Let me touch on this then. Finally, just don't take any of this personally, right? As I've said a few times, we're all playing roles for each other, we're all delivering and receiving messages. At the same time, we're receiving messages for others. We need to draw awareness to how we are sending our messages, so we are sending messages consciously in a way that is effective for people to receive them. And then, we are receiving messages constantly in a way that holistically is balanced for us to receive. Filtering out the crap that we don't need and keeping the things that we're meant to hear for us to get better in all the ways we're meant to. In alignment with our path and purpose, and in our greatest goods and the greatest goods of all.

    This is why this exchange is happening. This is why energies are moving back and forth. Do not just go head into the hills and avoid the world. It's a beautiful place, but there's still stuff there, the universe will still challenge you there. It doesn't mean you are not in the universe. There is no out. We always say, "Life is not about waiting for the storm to pass, it's about learning to dance in the rain." So, step into the world, be present, participate, be amazing, do great things, disrupt businesses that aren't efficient, do stuff better, do stuff cooler. Bring it, right? Have your voice and make your impact in a positive way upon the world.

    But, don't hide from it. And just accept that these things are going to come. Let's just improve the way we respond, manage, and deal with them. That is the work that we can control, that is the work that we should do.

    This is Chad McMillan. Again, Fresh and Raw episode 11, we are flowing with good, amazing stuff here. I'm really stoked on how interesting this content's getting, both to share and see it come up about in my day and share it with all of you. Hope you're loving it.

    Like, comment, share if you're digging it. Let other people know if you're feeling it, and you think it could benefit them as well. That is the intention here, is to be able to share these messages and these insights far and wide. To those that are sitting around in their own space looking for guidance and help, and hoping to receive them.

    And away we go. We will continue the good work. Again, Chad McMillan. Appreciate your time, appreciate you being here, and we'll chat with you soon.

    All of my ideas and insights come from a place of greater empowerment… for you to find that similar strength in yourself.

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